Chandler, Arizona, United States

There's an old saying. If you don't want someone to join a crowd, you ask them, "If everyone were jumping off of a cliff, would you?" Well, I have. So my answer would be "Yes". True story.
Profile continued . . .


Wednesday, March 12, 2014

this entry brought to you by sleater-kinney, "combat rock"

JACKSONVILLE-- Loving husband and father of two Jay Rose announced today that he is completely supportive of his wife's enormous gay porn collection, which she masturbates to completion watching on a nearly daily basis.

"I love my wife more than anything," said the husband of 12 years to reporters, "and she has around 12 gigs of gay porn sitting on our hard drive, and although I don't know exactly what that means about her, I will support her in her expressions of sexuality no matter what."

Rose, who admits to having sex with his wife "between four and five times a month, like most loving couples," says that when he first moved in with her, she made a lot of efforts to hide her gay porn habits, saving the files in a well buried folder, deleting web search history, and pretending that her interest in gay movie stars was purely out of idle curiosity.

However, as the years went on, the hiding of her fetish got sloppier, he explained. "It got to the point where sometimes I'd come in the room and would see an open movie file of three men lined up, each penetrating the other, just there, paused on the screen. Thank god the kids were at school!" said the man, who isn't sure what in the world she gets out of seeing it, "but hey, who am I to judge my own wife?"

Jay Rose explained that Susie, the mother of his children, likes all types of gay porn, from Twinks to Bears, from Otters to muscular weight lifters, "And even loves Chicken Smurf Doms having sex with Auntie Abigail Subs", and seems to enjoy all positions, and all situations that any number of gay men would find themselves in where they might have sex.

Still, although she frequently gets her rocks off to all manner of man on man action, "Her favorite is clearly when cholos trick straight white men, often fathers or husbands, into having gay sex with them. I can tell she really gets a kick out of them, because they are always labeled with all capital letters," explained the proud husband, whose porn preference is "blonde girls with big natural boobs," and, if he's feeling especially naughty, "tattoo chicks".

"I don't know what the attraction is," said Rose to members of the press, "and I don't get why a straight woman would be so into watching gay men go at one another with such aggression. I'm sure if I were a psychologist, I would be able to make interesting observations-- clearly it means something. But as loving husband, I say she can continue to watch all the gay porn she wants, especially since she always rides me like an insane jackhammer that needs to blow off steam when she's done."

When asked if he would ever be interested in having another male over for a threesome, Rose's answer was no, "Because my wife always finds bi-porn to be boring because she doesn't want to see, as she words it, 'fake gays', and doesn't want to see real gays 'fuck some dumb bitch'."

"Besides," concluded Rose, "What if he accidentally touched me or something? Fucking ew."

with love from CRS @ 10:11 AM 


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