CRS
Chandler, Arizona, United States

There's an old saying. If you don't want someone to join a crowd, you ask them, "If everyone were jumping off of a cliff, would you?" Well, I have. So my answer would be "Yes". True story.
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Gay People's Stories Always Start Exactly The Same

Saturday, February 08, 2014

this entry brought to you by feist, "the undiscovered first"


Listen, I support gay people always in all things. Okay? But you know what bugs me?

When a gay person tells their story of coming out, their story always starts the same. And as an open minded liberal fag lover, I would never take that away from them. But they always start the same:

"I wasn't like other boys. I didn't want to play football, and I didn't watch wrestling. I wanted a poster of Julia Roberts on my wall, not Troy Aikman."

What bothers me about it is that the gay guy's story sounds an awful lot like mine. When I was in second grade, I ordered a Punky Brewster poster from the school catalog because I had the hugest crush on Punk Brewster, and it wasn't until it arrived that I realized it was for girls, and even then only because the "Punky Trivia" on the back had hearts and flowers on it.

And don't tell me about how you liked to put on your mother's make-up! If you have kids, they will get in their mother's make-up, regardless of gender. Kids will also stick quarters up their nose, that doesn't make them coke addicts. "I wasn't like other girls. I never wanted a Barbie Doll. I'd rather go fishing with my dad."

That sounds exactly like every girl I've ever had sex with, and many of them have gone on to be married with men and have children. Sure, they could all just be fooling themselves, but they sure seem happy getting cock all the time.

The thing is, gay people can just skip the part where they didn't feel like other boys because of the TV shows they watched as a kid or the magazines they read. They can skip right to the part where all day they dreamed about giving the biggest, mooshiest, most grabbiest hug to their best friends while in gym class. Just going all day trying to play it cool in hopes they could smell their hair. That's what separated gay people from straight people. The rest of us were trying to slip a look down our friend's hot mom's blouse.

with love from CRS @ 6:43 AM 

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