Chandler, Arizona, United States
There's an old saying. If you don't want someone to join a crowd, you ask them, "If everyone were jumping off of a cliff, would you?" Well, I have. So my answer would be "Yes". True story.
Profile continued . . .
Watching a Woman Cry on a Live Sex Cam
with love from CRS @ 3:46 PM
this entry brought to you by portal soundtrack, "999999"
Although I've written about them several times, I don't actually visit porn cam sites very often. I find them, for the most part, completely boring, and if I'm clicking on them I'm probably bored myself, and it's far too easy to find yourself having wasted a dozen minutes of your time just waiting for anything to happen.
But here I was, clicking around the site that, in the rare times I get in the mood for a cam site, I browse. Nothing was happening, so I decided to try another, and I came across a website called Chaturbate. There was a really good looking couple on cam, and I decided to click.
It's important to note that when you click on a cam site that allows couples on cam (the one I go to the most does not), if you click on one, they frequently look utterly indifferent. Even while doing it on cam, they frequently look like they're barely paying attention to what they're doing, and could be doing literally anything else. This couple, on the other hand, looked actively unhappy. They didn't look sad, they didn't look angry, but their faces were curled into a slight frown, their eyes looked dry and weary, the shadows under the eyes sunk. They laid in their bed, she covering her body with a blanket. He was half halfheartedly chatting about nothing in particular, one or two word answers. She didn't say a word. Just continued to frown.
I decided to look at their profile after a minute or two of looking at them. "Welcome to the shitty, horrible, fucked-up world of [this couple, whose names I can't remember], where we torture one another lovingly. Our cam is not for the feint of heart!" There were pictures of them locking one another in various stockades, butts exposed. There were pictures of them with various uncomfortable looking penetrative devices. The videos said things like putting peppers on each other's genitals. That kind of thing.
When it comes to sex acts, telling me "not for the feint of heart" makes me stop watching, because I am, in fact, feint of heart when it comes to sex acts. So I honestly thought I'd closed the window and gone off and played a video game, not having found anything worth looking at in the past few minutes of screwing around on the computer. But a half hour or so later my game crashed, and I found that the window was still open. I clicked on it and found her curled in a ball, weeping openly, and he comforting her.
She wasn't bawling, exactly, but it was this long, drawn out weep that she was making no effort to stop. It was just coming out. He seemed hapless to help but also half-hearted. His arm was around her and he was patting her gently. I had the sound down but his face seemed cheerful, as if saying something funny or silly in order to get her to laugh.
What the fuck? What had happened since I had last watched? Had she been crying the entire time? I looked at the chat screen and surprisingly few people were talking about the woman weeping into the sheet, on camera for all of them to see. Eventually, someone finally asked, and got this response:
The couple I was watching was into torturing one another. Their current torture scheme was to stay up for 48 hours, on webcam the entire time, and every 500 tokens tipped to them, they would do a sex thing. At this moment, when they reached 500, she would give him a blowjob, and they were hovering around 200 tokens. They were 33 hours into this 48 hour marathon. They had been fucking, sucking, and torturing that entire time.
I was watching a woman crying not for anything specific, but because she had been awake for 33 hours. Which would explain the unhappy look on their faces when I clicked on them. And it would explain why she wasn't even bothering to try to stop crying-- she probably couldn't even try to stop crying. It was probably taking every ounce of energy just to uncontrollably cry.
Listen. I am into pretty vanilla sex. I hate this fucking torture shit, and what's more, yes, I know it's all well in good to perform torture sex acts on a consenting adult, but it's fucking weird, and there's something weird in your head if this is the thing you're into doing.
However. I would rather be locked up in a fucking horse stockade getting penetrated by a spiked dildo and being forced to drink human urine for one hour than be awake for 33 hours doing anything. Even if it were 33 hours of just sitting on a couch playing video games, I'd rather just get fucked in the ass while drinking piss and get it the fuck over with. But this woman was being fucked and spanked and sucked and whatever the fuck else for the entirety of that 33 hours? And she had 15 hours to go?
I honestly think someone would have to kidnap her and take her into a deprogramming center before she could be returned to normal society. Your first name is Anna, her trained counselor would say over and over. You are a human being, with thoughts, emotions, and desires. People love you. The world is not unending penetration into your anus, vagina, and mouth for all eternity. Some day you will die peacefully and quietly. We love you, Anna.