Chandler, Arizona, United States

There's an old saying. If you don't want someone to join a crowd, you ask them, "If everyone were jumping off of a cliff, would you?" Well, I have. So my answer would be "Yes". True story.
Profile continued . . .

My Reaction to the George Zimmerman "Not Guilty" Verdict

Sunday, July 14, 2013

this entry brought to you by radiohead, "paperbag writer"

Sometimes a redneck will say "If I were ever elected President, I would nuke the whole Middle East! Bahahaha!" And the thing is, it's not really funny, it has gross ethno-centric overtones, it's just dumb.

But oh my god I am so serious, if I am ever elected President, the first thing I'm doing is annexing Florida and I'm nuking the motherfucker. The whole state smells like balls, and it has no place amongst the other, non-testicle smelling states. It's a disgusting cesspool of sub-humanity, and it's time to cut it the hell loose. Listen, the rest of the southern states are on my shit list. But none of them have reached the point where they're beyond dealing with. We can still teach the rest of the southern states to behave. They can unlearn their backward ways, and while they can't yet be treated like grown-ups, we can at least be diplomatic. Florida? There's no goddamn use for it. Let it be obliterated and sent into the ocean. Maybe in a million years something will walk up out of the ocean where Florida once stood and learn to breathe, something that is actually a sign of intelligence.

You do not shoot unarmed people. You just don't. The George Zimmerman trial continually returned to Travyon Martin's character. What kind of person would wear a hoodie and have pictures of themselves with gold teeth? Maybe he was slightly more suspicious than we're lead to believe!

Listen, I don't give a shit if Trayvon Martin was a Super Duper Dope-Dealer with 500 pounds of black tar crack-meth on his person, and was dealing it to a twelve year old in the streets at the exact moment George Zimmerman came across him. If he doesn't have a weapon, you don't get to shoot drug dealers! You just don't! Even if they're totally mad dogging you looking all mean, grrrrr!

And one of the defense lawyers said that, make no mistake, this was "no boy", and that George Zimmerman-- who had followed this unarmed not-a-boy with gun in hand-- feared for his life when the boy attacked him. But Zimmerman had a gun! Even if this kid was fucking a Super Duper Drug Dealing Bruce Lee, and he could five-finger-death-punch George Zimmerman into exploding into a pile of guts, he wasn't on George Zimmerman's property! You don't get to shoot unarmed people who you have stalked when you're not even protecting your property! You just don't! You just don't.

Listen, if it sounds like I'm being harsh when I say "nuke the state of Florida", please know that I do not say that out of hostility or malice. Florida is clearly in pain. It is clearly in a vegetative state, a body with no clear brain functions for years upon years as it lies there, its body overgrowing with tumors. It's for the best. We need to put Florida down. It's the fucking humane thing to do.

People will say, well, nobody knows for sure what happened that night between George Zimmerman and Trayvon Martin that night. Well I could tell you for goddamn sure what didn't happen! One, Trayvon Martin did not pull out a gun on George Zimmerman. Two, I can tell you for certain that Martin did not stalk George Zimmerman in his car with his "unnaturally slow and meandering gait". And three, I am absolutely positive that, when cornered, Trayvon Martin did not reveal himself to be a Dementor, a soul-sucking extra-dimensional monster who feeds on human happiness and the only way Zimmerman could avoid being sucked into a void of nonexistence would be to shoot it to death.

And what the fuck is this "Stand Your Ground" bullshit anyway? What kind of cowboy-dumbfuck nonsense is "Stand Your Ground"? The constitution already allows owning personal handguns, the state allows for those weapons to be on your person, you're already allowed to defend yourself when you feel like your life is threatened, why the fuck was this nonsense buttfucking cowboy garbage law introduced in the first place? Was there really a rash of firearm owners going to jail for legally using their weapons? Or was this just some macho bullshit written to further embolden the most emboldened people in the country? Because I'll tell you a fact that I didn't even have to look up: More innocent people in Florida are killed with firearms than there were law-abiding gun owners going to jail.

What other legal things do we specifically write laws to further embolden?? Keep in mind this wasn't a pre-existing law that they decided to interpret a new way. This was a new law specifically written to give more rights to people who already have all of the rights. What other thing do we do this for?

Why not a new law saying bike riders get to ride their bikes on people's rooftops! Fuck it! It's their right! They own the bike fair and square, who are you to tell them what they can and cannot do with them? And introducing a new law where you can drive your car inside of a mall! Why do you have so much of a problem with law abiding citizens having a right to drive their vehicles wherever the fuck they want? What if they really really feel like they need to drive in a mall? We need a law to increase car drivers' rights!! Why do you hate law-abiding citizens?

Fuck it! Let's write up a new law allowing dynamite in libraries! If you have a license to buy dynamite, you should be able to blow the fuck up wherever you want. This is America!!

Georgia, guess what? It's hot in Georgia! You're getting beach front property. And thousands and thousands of gorgeous co-eds Spring Breaking the shit out of your state. And don't get me wrong, Georgia, there is some shit we are going to have to sit down and have a talk about. But as a token of good faith, you get gorgeous, beach-front property and college girls who are dee-tee-eff.

Also, anyone who was somehow on George Zimmerman's side and was happy at the verdict, Oh my god, dudes, I have heard real estate is so crazy cheap in Florida right now! It's a total steal! And the whole state totally does not smell like balls! You'd better hurry up and get down there! You have one full year, until I'm old enough to run for President! You fucking mongrel assholes.

with love from CRS @ 2:15 PM 


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