Chandler, Arizona, United States

There's an old saying. If you don't want someone to join a crowd, you ask them, "If everyone were jumping off of a cliff, would you?" Well, I have. So my answer would be "Yes". True story.
Profile continued . . .


Monday, February 11, 2013

this entry brought to you by saul williams, "tr(n)igger"

JACKSON-- Ten days into the month of February, Mississippi Governor Phil Bryant has held a press conference to go into detail about his current state budget, which will begin on March 1st, 2013. Governor Bryant then concluded his conference by saying, "Oh, and uh, it's Black History Month. So, you know. Black people go ahead and... history... You know," before trailing off, and leaving the stage.

Teachers across the state of Mississippi have followed the Governor's lead, and are briefly altering their regularly scheduled lesson plans of emphasizing that evolution is just a theory and you can choose to ignore it or not, as well as disregarding any information about sexual activity by repeatedly underlining the word "marriage" on a chalkboard, to cover Black History Month.

Seventh grade history teacher Mrs. Helen Birch, told her class today that "Black History Month is this month, and is very important, so that we can learn how important African Americans have been to America's growth," before moving on to discussing how all the founding fathers were divinely inspired by an intelligent designer, and that the North was an aggressor during the Civil War, invading the sovereign nation of the Confederacy.

Sophomore history teacher Madilyn Gray spent three minutes in her class yesterday naming various popular sports figures that are black in honor of Black History Month, concluding that many of today's most popular sports would have much less interesting if it were not for black people. "So for the rest of this February, think about how different the Super Bowl would have been if not for Black History," then proceeded to pretend to not see any of the hands that went up for questions, awkwardly looking outside the window.

When reached for comment, Governor Bryant said "Black History Month is very important to this great state, and should be regarded as important as, you know, however important a month dedicated to it should be. But there is no way I'm going to even pretend to care about National Hispanic American Heritage Month, Asian-Pacific American History Month, or Women's History Month."

The Governor then asked, "And why the hell isn't there a white history month? Hmm? Ever think of that? How come I'm the first person to ever ask such a thing?"

with love from CRS @ 12:21 PM 


Post a Comment