CRS
Chandler, Arizona, United States

There's an old saying. If you don't want someone to join a crowd, you ask them, "If everyone were jumping off of a cliff, would you?" Well, I have. So my answer would be "Yes". True story.
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What The News Would Have Been Like Nov. 4th if John McCain Had Won

Friday, November 07, 2008

this entry brought to you by the stereotypes, "triangle girl"



Uhm. Hm. Wow. Well uh, it's been an historic night. Not quite as historic as we, uhm, expected it to be, but what a night. Although the nation has gone into this day expecting a Barack Obama win, John McCain has unexpectedly, at the last minute, turned in a slight but solid victory. There is no need for any recounts. John McCain is the 44th President of the United States. Hm. And uh. Congratulations go out to him and his campaign for somehow, quite inexplicably, pulling it off. *cough*


Since we, uh, were actually expecting an Obama victory, we had a Black Guy waiting on stand-by for his reaction to an Obama victory, and the simple fact is, neither party has yet to signal that they're ready to give any speeches, and until then we have time to fill. So let's go to Byron Jackson about John McCain's stunning and freakish victory. Byron?


Well Tom, as you said it's been quite a historic evening. Barack Obama became the first black man in American history to lose to a white man on a National scale. And since there are no other prominent black men or women with anywhere near the amount of traction as Barack Obama had, there may never be a black man that can lose to a white man for President of the United States of America in my life time, or perhaps ever again. Indeed, this is one for the history books. America wanted change, but not anywhere near the amount of change as we had initially thought. And change is exactly what they got. They are now about to have a slightly different and much older white guy in office of the highest position in the world. And that's change America apparently felt it could believe in.


But it's about more than that, Tom. This isn't just about Barack Obama's unexpected and horrifying loss. This is also about millions of bitter, scared, confused white people who have had nowhere else to act on their fears but with racism, which the McCain campaign has been keen to invoke. And it sure worked out for him. Now those millions of white people will tell their Grandchildren when asked how the hell they could possibly have been for something so obviously ass-backwards and counterproductive, "I didn't not vote for him because he was black, but because he was a Muslim. And not just any normal American-Hating Muslim, but also a Muslim terrorist, and would've joined together with Al Qaeda in a way not unlike Voltron, and would create a giant terrorist robot to destroy capitalism, democracy, and most importantly, freedom. John McCain practically said so himself during his speeches."


And further, across the country, there are millions of black people and minorities who are right now imagining a day, in the not too far future, when their children ask them, "Mommy and daddy, can I ever be President?" and they'll look into their children's eyes adoringly and say "Almost." Truly, this is a very historic day for America and democracy, and a now historic level of disenfranchised voters who may or may not be rioting at this very moment as I speak.


*long, audible sigh*


...Back to you, Tom.
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with love from CRS @ 4:22 AM 

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