CRS
Chandler, Arizona, United States
There's an old saying. If you don't want someone to join a crowd, you ask them, "If everyone were jumping off of a cliff, would you?" Well, I have. So my answer would be "Yes". True story.
Profile continued . . .
The Sarah Palin Show
this entry brought to you by wolfmother, "appletree"
Rolling Stone magazine ran a joke proposing a Sarah Palin show. They made it ridiculous, and it was a funny idea. But here's the thing: I honestly, without irony, think The Sarah Palin Show wouldn't be a bad idea. I actually would look forward to seeing that.
I am repulsed by Sarah Palin. I'm not just repulsed by her as a politician, but also as a person. But think about it. Sarah Palin would hardly be the first repulsive person to get her own TV show. Hell, they gave Paula Abdul her own television show, and I have no idea who wanted to see her life for honest, non exploitive reasons. This is exactly why a Sarah Palin show would work. It's January of 2009, the elections are over, and Obama won. Sarah Palin is a horrible creature, but also a creature that it would be a shame to just disappear. Imagine a reality TV show that followed her life for six weeks, showing her intimate life, her family life, her life amongst friends, her life as an actual Governor of the least occupied state of the union on a week to week basis. We would get to see what the real Sarah Palin is like in her natural environment, without the fevered-state masses howling at the moon below the podium that we see during the end game of the election cycle.
The thing is, I'm a liberal, and as a liberal, it's impossible for me to imagine what the other side is like. Impossible. We try to fathom what kind of creature could live this way, and we come up empty. We wouldn't be able to help ourselves but to watch Sarah Palin. It could work two-fold. It could help us understand our enemy, maybe humanize them a little. After all, everyone here is an American, and on a base level, we all want the same thing. We just go about those ends through wildly different means. And being able to see Sarah Palin, this person that represents everything we hate, in her natural state, we could perhaps understand a little better where the right is coming from. On the other hand, it could also boil down to pure train wreck factor, the exact same reason why we all bothered to tune in to those Katie Couric interviews and the Vice Presidential debate. She horrifies us, yet we can't look away. It's like seeing into the eyes of the Devil-- and she's perky! But even I can't deny that she's intriguing, from a horrified onlooker point of view. We could look at her as everything that's wrong with the world, a confirmation that our worst fears were all true. But we would still look at her. Removing her from the chance of being president would take part of her poison away. Oh, a Sarah Palin back in Alaska, in her own home, is still dangerous, but not in the sort of imminent threat sort of way she would be in the White House. She's a danger that we could observe from afar, curious, horrified. It would, frankly, be good TV. It'd be far superior than watching the normal celebrity idiots that get their own reality shows, which America watches for the exact same reason why we'd watch a Sarah Palin Show.
And for the right, for middle America, she'd be a breath of fresh air. She would be a self-affirmation, right there on their TV. Instead of Liberal Hollywood shoving another Celebu-brat down our throats which none of us can relate with, out partying and doing drugs and having abortions, they'd finally have somebody who the cameras might catch praying, who the cameras will definitely catch doing down-home mothering, mixing her busy life with family matters, being a gosh darned All American mom. They would tune in dutifully. And again, Sarah Palin is dangerous because she represents something dangerous in America. But so long as we can contain that danger into something we can observe, like a bear in a cage, well, it doesn't make it less dangerous, but it makes it easier to handle. We can know that America will be tuning in to Sarah Palin, and there's no way, no how, not a chance she can have control over anything consequential to anybody outside of her shitty, snow-covered, depressing hellhole of a state. And I see how someone amongst my liberal peers would argue that giving Sarah Palin her own show would empower other freakazoids like her to rise to power, but if you think about it, this is exactly as dangerous as letting our young watch normal reality TV, which empowers the most shallow, narcissistic of us to actually be accepted as normal human beings as they're accepted on TV, instead of awful plastic people which they are. And, on the best possible outcome, Middle America could see that her privileged, Beauty Queen life is, despite the spin otherwise, absolutely nothing like their own, and might be discouraged from being blinded like that in the future. Hey, it could happen.
Honestly, if there are any wise television producers out there keeping track of everything, hopefully they've already got Sarah Palin's number on their speed dial for the moment McCain loses, ready to sign her up for a television deal. Admit it. You'd watch it, regardless of whether she makes you want to vomit or whether she makes you thank The Lord Jesus Christ for her mere existence.
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if, of course, mccain does win, and i go back and read this four years from now, i'm going to feel like an idiot for ever having written this.
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with love from CRS @ 6:58 AM
2 Comments:
I told you so! I wrote a article guessing at Palin's future last week and this came up as the most likely possibility.
Read this to see other possible career moves:
http://rumorreport.com/2008/10/20/coming-soon-to-a-tv-near-you-the-sarah-palin-show-2/
An oil painting of Sarah Palin howling at the moon with a pancake on her head
