CRS
Chandler, Arizona, United States

There's an old saying. If you don't want someone to join a crowd, you ask them, "If everyone were jumping off of a cliff, would you?" Well, I have. So my answer would be "Yes". True story.
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Bloody Mary

Sunday, July 22, 2007

this entry brought to you by the beatles, "strawberry fields forever"


I remember when I was young the various little creepy games we'd play to freak one another out that get passed down from generation to generation. I don't know what you'd call it. Childhood folklore? But things like "Light as a feather, Stiff as a Board", the Ouija board, and especially Bloody Mary.

I don't know specifically what it is about Bloody Mary that makes it so effective. When you hear about Bloody Mary, you're already at an age where it sounds idiotically impossible. You turn around three times and say "Bloody Mary", and this horrible demon will appear, and, depending on who's telling you the story, maybe reach out and scar you. You know that this doesn't just seem like it couldn't happen, it seems stupid.

Yet there's something about it that seems terrifying, something that sinks in and makes you believe it, or want to believe it. Maybe it's because everyone you know is terrified to try it, maybe it's the fact that you're young enough to not question the existence of God, and the idea of Bloody Mary, sort of this anti Virgin Mary, seems dangerously real. God is always this thing that is so far away but is real, you know it's real, and the idea of an Anti-Virgin Mary doesn't seem any more far fetched than, say, the Devil. Yet if the Devil himself showed up in the mirror if you turned around and said his name three times, you wouldn't believe that-- the Devil himself was far too important to show up in your mirror at such minor provocation. This idea of this entity that you'd never heard of that still sounded familiar was much more real to you.

Whatever it is about Bloody Mary, I was terrified of her; even though I didn't believe in other things kids believe in, like Santa Clause. I don't think I would've admitted it at the time-- in fact, I didn't admit it. The rational part of me, and that's a big part, always has been a big part, thought it was idiotic. There's no way there's anything called Bloody Mary that would ever show up, and what kind of silly thing is it to turn around three times? What about turning around would possibly make some apparition appear? Yet secretly I was terrified that it just might work. Because I was a little kid. It's not as if I could explain the universe.

So in the third grade, my friends and I decided that we were going to try it. This one girl, I don't remember her name, volunteered to do it, which is funny, because I think I wanted to try it, but once she said she also did, I immediately ducked out, relieved that I wouldn't actually have to go through with it, even though I was sure nothing would happen. She went inside the bathroom and stood in front of the mirror while I stood outside of her bathroom, the door open, so that she was in sight the whole time. We'd heard it only worked if one person was in the bathroom, so we figured this would be the best way-- I could see if anything appeared in the mirror, so if she came out claiming "I SAW IT I SAW IT!" I could prove whether she was a liar or not. She looked over at me; half frightened, and then started spinning around...

This is one of those times where maybe I'm remembering wrong. Maybe what I remember happening next didn't actually happen next, maybe it's just my memory making a more convenient, scary ending that fit the story better. You know, writers do it all the time. They are writing something from memory, reach a point where they aren't sure if what happened next is the way they think it happened, but what they think might have happened makes the story better, so they don't bother trying to confirm it, they just go with it. I've done it a bunch of times. And maybe this is one of those times. But I swear, this is my recollection of what happened next:

She turned around three times and said "Bloody Mary, Bloody Mary, Bloody Mar--"

And with that, the door slammed shut. I don't know if anyone else was in the bathroom, because I didn't search the room. And maybe the air conditioner kicked on or somebody closed a door in another room, because my room at my home a few years later was famous for doors constantly swinging into a loud slammed shut-- not just a door going from cracked to closed, but from half open to slammed shut-- from the pressure in the house of doors opening and closing, but I do know that she was too far away from the door to have done it herself. I fell backwards and stared with horror, which is the exact opposite of what one would think I would do, which is to open the door back up and see if I can see anything happening. The rest of our friends shrieked in horror at this, and there was this moment where if felt like electricity was in the air. The door opened, and my friend walked out, her face white, wide eyed, as if she had seen, well, Bloody Mary.

"What happened in there?" we asked, half horrified, half excited.

She shook her head no. Not no as in she didn't see Bloody Mary, but no, she didn't want to talk about it.

There was no way in hell any of us were going to ever try to tease Bloody Mary again. There was no way in hell. I remember when I told this story to people as a child, the story kind of mutated a little bit, as children are apt to do. I told the story the exact same way, except that I added that she had scratch marks on her face. She did not have scratch marks on her face. Right now I'm positive she was ghost white and scared because the door slammed shut inexplicably, because it's not as if Bloody Mary came out and did anything to her. Nevertheless I never actually learned what happened in there or why she was scared. She never told.

I'm slightly ashamed to admit this, but probably when I was 21 I was standing in front of the mirror one day and, you know, brushing my teeth or whatever, and I thought back to that day. And it was silly and foolish, but you know-- I'd never actually tried Bloody Mary for myself. Never tried it before it happened because I was sure it wouldn't work and was too afraid to be proven wrong. Never tried it afterward because I still didn't believe in Bloody Mary per se, but was too terrified to tempt fate, especially now that we already had one traumatized little girl that had fallen victim to it. But there I was, a fully grown adult, thinking, oh, it's not going to hurt anything, and I've never actually proven it wrong-- so I turned off the light, twirled around three times while saying "Bloody Mary."

...Nothing happened.
------



with love from CRS @ 10:25 AM 

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