CRS
Chandler, Arizona, United States
There's an old saying. If you don't want someone to join a crowd, you ask them, "If everyone were jumping off of a cliff, would you?" Well, I have. So my answer would be "Yes". True story.
Profile continued . . .
GUARANTEED PRANK WAR WINNERS
this entry brought to you by radiohead, "in limbo"
Are you and a coworker having a friendly inter-office prank war? Did he just prank you so good you're not sure how you'll get him back? Ready to throw in the towel? Fear not! Here are three pranks guaranteed to out-prank your adversary! The first one is easy and something you can do today. The next is more complex and requires more setup, but the results will be worth it, and the final one is the ultimate prank of all time! But no matter which you choose, your coworkers will enjoy the ingenuity of these pranks so much, you'll be talked about for generations!
* Wait until your adversary leaves his desk, and time this so that you'll purposefully get caught on his way back. Go to his desk, and take as big a dump as you can on it. When he returns and you're emptying your bowels on his personal belongings, he will no doubt ask you how you could do such a thing. Reply by calling him an inappropriate racial slur. For example, if your coworker is white, say it's because he's an ugly n-bomb. If he's black, call him a wop. Be creative!
* Find out the names and addresses of your adversary's family. Meet, seduce, and then have sex with every female member of that person's family that you can find that is of legal age, making sure to capture each experience on film. Now hack into Yahoo.com, replacing the home page with your escapades. When you go to work and your adversary approaches you about it, threaten to sue him for invasion of privacy. Tell him you have very powerful lawyers, even if you don't!
*Begin having an ongoing, secret homosexual love affair with your boss's boss, making sure to start off hot and heavy, and, over the months, gradually move into tender and loving. This will ensure a deep, heartfelt relationship that your gay lover will not want to let go of. Make this last for at least a year. At some point during this period of time, scour your adversary's desk for hair fiber or anything else with his DNA on it-- if you can go through your adversary's trash at home and find a used condom, even better. Once you are confident that your gay lover will do anything for you, murder your immediate boss, being very careful to remove all evidence it was you and planting the DNA from your adversary (if you found a used condom, this is where it will come in handy, because spreading this on your corpse-boss in several places will make the killer seem even more sick in the head!) Now that your boss is gone, the company will need to replace him. Tell your gay lover that putting you in the position will be too obvious, but that your adversary would be a good replacement. As the following weeks pass, your adversary will become comfortable in his new position, and this is when the FBI will have connected the DNA to him and will arrest him. The prosecution will have a motive (getting a sweet, unprecedented raise) as well as the conclusive DNA evidence, and he will be given the maximum sentence. Live the rest of your life. On your deathbed, invite your surviving then-coworkers. Reveal yourself as the mastermind behind your adversary's conviction. Bask in the glory of having been the ultimate prank master. Die.
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on this day last year a review of queens of the stone age's lullabies to paralyze. if you like reviews, and i know some of you do-- worth reading, as always.
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with love from CRS @ 10:55 PM
1 Comments:
Haven't actually read your blog, but was reading http://batteriesfeelincluded.blogspot.com/2009/05/309.html and saw your comment.
You probably already know this, but the answer to your question is easy: stumbleupon.com
Look at that guy's blog. Every entry has at most a handful of comments. It is only that one entry, which I (and most people) found through stumbleupon that has a few hundred comments...
