A Few Fantastically Horrible Foreign Last Names
this entry brought to you by franz ferdinand, "the fallen"
I hate it when you see a person with a name like "Kuntz". And you try to pronounce it "Coonts", because holy shit, there is no way any human being could possibly be cursed with such a horrid last name. And inevitably they're like, "No, it's pronounced cunts."
Wouldn't you just lie? I mean, your surname is Kuntz, wouldn't you change it to Koontz, or even better, maybe Donaldson?
For example, Koreans have phenomenally hilarious names. You hear stories of guys named Phuck Kyu, and I swear to you, I knew one named Dong Menu. It was actually spelled Dong Minyu or something like that, but you know, I don't care if Dong Minyu was the name of your sainted Grandfather who died during the Korean war saving a whole village of innocent women and children, once you get here to America and get a firm grasp of the English language, you change your name to Bruce Lee. And I don't even care if Bruce Lee was Chinese and you're Korean, change your fucking name. Naming yourself after the wrong ethnicity is still better than Dong Minyu.
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with love from CRS @ 8:10 PM
Saturday, March 11, 2006
I hate it when you see a person with a name like "Kuntz". And you try to pronounce it "Coonts", because holy shit, there is no way any human being could possibly be cursed with such a horrid last name. And inevitably they're like, "No, it's pronounced cunts."
Wouldn't you just lie? I mean, your surname is Kuntz, wouldn't you change it to Koontz, or even better, maybe Donaldson?
For example, Koreans have phenomenally hilarious names. You hear stories of guys named Phuck Kyu, and I swear to you, I knew one named Dong Menu. It was actually spelled Dong Minyu or something like that, but you know, I don't care if Dong Minyu was the name of your sainted Grandfather who died during the Korean war saving a whole village of innocent women and children, once you get here to America and get a firm grasp of the English language, you change your name to Bruce Lee. And I don't even care if Bruce Lee was Chinese and you're Korean, change your fucking name. Naming yourself after the wrong ethnicity is still better than Dong Minyu.
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