CRS
Chandler, Arizona, United States

There's an old saying. If you don't want someone to join a crowd, you ask them, "If everyone were jumping off of a cliff, would you?" Well, I have. So my answer would be "Yes". True story.
Profile continued . . .

ARCHIVES!
BUSHWHACKER'S Message for the Holidays!

Saturday, December 24, 2005

this entry brought to you by queens of the stone age, "songs for the dead"




Attention "Americans". It is I who goes by many names; The Bushwhacker. I'm hoping that you are doin' just fine tonight, this, the eve of our holiest of holy holidays, the day that those of us Godly folks that don't worship freaky-ass gods or belong to any funky non-Christ related cults celebrate know as Christmas. Now, for those of you that may belong to one of them "religions" that makes God angry and vengeful, and are too ignorant to see the path of the Lord, Christmas is the day we celebrate the birth of The Christ by taking the day off, opening presents, and, according to certain songs, gather 'round the Christmas tree and sing about it.

With this in mind, I took some time out from vacationing, my meetin's with my Cabinet of the Damned on strategic ways of fucking the world up, and my public relations meetin's on how to make poor black people hate me even more-- because, I mean, fuck those people, you know?-- and decided to give you so-called "Americans" an important message for the holidays.

In this, The Hour of America's Greatest Hour, we are at war with Iraq. We have ended the rule of a batshit insane lunatic freakazoid tyrant that ruled his people with an religiously fundamentalist iron fist, fixing elections, refusing to allow investigations into his past and current criminal cover-ups, letting thousands of people die, and showing up on TV frequently to tell the people lies! And although this horrible bunion on the foot of humanity is gone, there is still so much more to do-- so many more deaths to be responsible for!

So, this Holiday season, I plea that you, the people of "America", think of the real heroes this holiday season. The heroes who are out there, year after year during the holidays, doing what they have to do. I'm speaking, of course, of the men and women of the NFL.

While you sorry sacks of crap are snuggled up to your loved ones this Christmas Eve by a nice, warm fire, eyeing your Christmas tree lovingly... I ask you, who is out there, busting their asses for a touchdown, keeping a determined, hardened stare at the offense, hoping against hope for the game winning field goal? The Dallas Cowboys, that's who. And tomorrow, as you stuff your gullets with delicious glazed ham, waiting with baited breath to jump right into playing your XBox 360 that you unwrapped earlier that morning... Who will be wishing they could be at home with their loved ones, these cherished times that these men and women, who are also fathers and mothers, will never get to have again? The Chicago Bears.

Ladies and gentleman, these are the true Americans. They are out there this holiday season, playing for America. They are playing for freedom. Why, the rest of us should feel ashamed just for living in the same country as these brave few, when we're not accomplishing as much and for as high a cost as they do. Some may want us to take them for granted. I say we salute them. We salute you, men and women of the NFL. Godspeed. Let's roll.

END COMMUNICATION.
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with love from CRS @ 9:18 PM 

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