CRS
Chandler, Arizona, United States

There's an old saying. If you don't want someone to join a crowd, you ask them, "If everyone were jumping off of a cliff, would you?" Well, I have. So my answer would be "Yes". True story.
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Parents Are Lame

Sunday, March 30, 2014

this entry brought to you by rem, "the sidewinder sleeps tonight"


I grew up at the beginning of "parents are lame" in the media. For some reason, despite the fact that my mom's generation had Led Zeppelin, The Godfather, and the goddamn moon landing, television, movies, and especially commercials decided that they were super lame, and needed to have it pointed out to us as frequently as possible how much our parents didn't understand.

DAD: Why do you guys like Apple Jacks? They don't taste like apples!
KID WITH MULLET: We like it because WE DO! You just don't get it! God you suck so much, dad! Stop talking to us! Who let you in here anyway? Go watch dumb old people shows on TV, you lame-o! God!
DAD: Welp, I guess you kids are right! *shrug* I don't know anything!

DAD: Hey son, Fruit By the Foot! Can I have some?
KID WITH 90'S 'TUDE: This Fruit by the Foot is for me! Not for bald ugly jerks! Go fucking kill yourself you lame fat asshole! Hey Billy, can you believe this fat piece of shit actually thinks he can get some Fruit By The Foot? No wonder mom is planning on leaving him!

VOICE OVER: Sonic the Hedgehog ain't your DADDY'S video game!
DAD: Hey son! Are you playing the new Sonic the Hedgehog game for the Sega Genesis? Why don't you ever play Mario anymore?
KID WITH SPIKY HAIR: HEEEELP! HEEEEEEELLLP! CHILD MOLESTER! SOMEBODY HELP, THIS GUY IS TOUCHING MY PRIVATES!
DAD: *shrug* I guess I don't understand what makes Sonic so rude crude and in your face!
VOICE OVER: Next time your DADDY asks you about video games, you'd better CALL THE POLICE! Cuz your dad is laaaaaame! Ask him to buy him Sonic the Hedgehog, what else is he good for anyway?
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with love from CRS @ 9:19 AM 

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