CRS
Chandler, Arizona, United States

There's an old saying. If you don't want someone to join a crowd, you ask them, "If everyone were jumping off of a cliff, would you?" Well, I have. So my answer would be "Yes". True story.
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How Dare the ACLU Force "Happy Holidays" Onto Us!

Monday, December 23, 2013

this entry brought to you by the knife, "full of fire"


It's Christmas time, and because it's Fox News, Bill O'Reilly was doing his "War on Christmas" for, what, the thirtieth year in a row.

The ACLU, it seems, according to O'Reilly, back in the mid 1990s, started forcing companies to use non-denominational holiday greetings for the advertisements, and this, somehow, was an attack on the sanctity of Christmas, which is weird on its face because advertisements, Christmas, and sanctity are weird words to put together. But what's more, it's simply not true. The ACLU can't force a private company to use non-religious words in its advertising. The country doesn't work that way. Hell, the ACLU doesn't work that way.

But let's assume everything Bill O'Reilly is saying is true.

That means there were companies too stupid to realize that marketing their fucking TVs and DVD players and microwaves and whatever the fuck else entirely to Christians during the highest buying period of the year was a bad idea.

"Alright, marketing team! Listen the fuck up! We have always just said 'Merry Christmas' in all of our gawdy, bloated commercials that we air starting the day after Thanksgiving, trying to get the money of only the 80% of the country that identifies as Christian because nobody else's money is good during December! But that all stops right this moment, thanks to these assholes at the ACLU. They are forcing us-- forcing us!-- to market to the entire population of the country by changing only two words to be more inclusive! Those monsters! How dare they force us to engage segments of the population we don't personally care about by involving them in capitalism?? How dare!! Our profits are probably going to start going up year over year because we're encouraging people that ordinarily felt left out during this time of the year to participate! We are helpless to stop this menace!
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with love from CRS @ 1:40 PM 

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