CRS
Chandler, Arizona, United States

There's an old saying. If you don't want someone to join a crowd, you ask them, "If everyone were jumping off of a cliff, would you?" Well, I have. So my answer would be "Yes". True story.
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DEAD KEYBOARDIST EASILY REPLACED BY MACBOOK PRO

Friday, October 12, 2012

this entry brought to you by kool and the gang, "jungle boogie"


CHICAGO-- After letting original drummer Giovanni Leonard go for being chronically late to both band practice and gigs, local up-and-coming band Prose Despair Equation has frantically searched for the past two months for a replacement, finally settling on scene veteran Sophie Rich.

"We've finished recording our first album," said lead singer and vocalist Connor Issacs, "but we couldn't support a release with live dates if our drummer wasn't going to show up on time."

Describing the drummer auditioning process as "grueling", Issacs said that the dispersal of Sophie Rich's previous band, Sad Special, as being perfect timing.

"We've been friends with Sad Special for years," said Issacs, "and when their lead singer announced she was pregnant and therefore wouldn't be continuing the band, it was as if God himself were smiling upon us, as Sophie is the perfect drummer for us. We couldn't be happier to have her."

Sophie Rich said that joining Prose Despair Equation is a perfect fit. "When I learned Sad Special would be breaking up, I was devastated. But then I learned my buddies at PDE needed a drummer and it was like, oh my god, how lucky could I get?"

Members of Prose Despair Equation did not, however, mention that their keyboardist, Charlie Hite, died one week ago after being shot to death while heroically attempting to stop an armed robbery of an elderly woman. It was also not mentioned that the replacement process amounted to a two minute conversation about how shocking it was that he was dead, followed by downloading looping software for bassist Jake Hatcher's three year old MacBook Pro with minimal hassle.

Hite was a husband and father of three, and had recently quit his job, saying that the money coming in from the band was finally enough to pay his bills. He had no life insurance.
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with love from CRS @ 3:29 PM 

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